Well~ Another tiring but interesting day. I like main campus ten trillion times better! OMG it's like....I don't know. A REAL college. It's not high school! Altoona was friggin high school all over again. Ahhh~ this is great!

Let's see....I woke up. Had a little breakfast (yeah for ramen!) and then caught the bus. Went to my first place which was alright. Then headed over to the student center. There I ended up meeting up with Liz again and went to find out how to register for campus wireless internet service. Went to the bank to withdrawl some money for books and then bought said books. Then got my picture taken for the bus pass ($200 value that I get from the apartment complex). At this point I'm pretty tired from dragging Vaio-chan around PLUS all my books...and the area isn't exactly flat. So we have lunch and then I go to the rest of my classes. I ended up meeting 2 new people today too! One was from my Egyptian mythology class. She seems really nice. ^_^ Her and one of her friends and I just sort of sat in the hallway outside of class and they talked and I listened because I was being a little shy, but none the less. And then in my Japanese class I happened to sit next to a guy who seemed as bored as I was because we both knew all the answers. (Though it's always nice to have a review....especially when the only stuff I really remember is impolite. Anyways.) He's into Accounting and Japanese and we talked about grammer and then laughed about how I suck at kanji and he's a cheater for being good at it (he's chinese).

Alot of my classes seem interesting. Though I may shoot myself in the head in Japanese. But at least it's good practice.

Oh! And how cool is this! For the Asian religion class one of the required readings is The Monkey King! How cool is that! Required!

Either way. Sleepy time! I miss you all!

Alright~ I'm up at school now. And tired as hell. Packing and driving and then unpacking. All the lifting and carrying and running around has tuckered me out.

mmm...Nap time. Maybe I'll read something.

I ended up buying a copy of the Sims...then realized that I didn't have a working CDrom drive.

Ended up installing an external CDrom drive (for other reasons. not just Sims). Went through the whole Sims installation process. But nooooo~ Noooo! can't seem to recognize the CDrom drive can you.

*pouts* stupid program. I even found Teni Puri skins. *grumble* I wanted to watch Golden Pair fluff.

I miss Heidi. So I've been listening to Ani Difranco and stuff from the Romeo+Juliet soundtrack. Heidi worships Ani. I wonder how she's doing...maybe I should just call her or something.

Did I mention WinMX crashed? WinMX crashed. Tried to pull the rest of my system down with it. But I was too quick for it! Ha!

*pouts* I wanted to watch Golden Pair fluff...maybe kill off some Sims while I'm at it.

Oh, because of travel stuff, I'm leaving Saturday rather than Friday. Dan's probably going to be pleased/pissed.

Oh well...this whole Sims thing gives me a good reason to start cleaning and defragging. *grabs a digital broom*

I went to church this morning. Even though I'm sort of pissed off at the Anglican church I still went so my parents don't think I'm some hellish degenerate.

It was an absolutely beautiful day today. The rain was cool and everything smelled so fresh. But everyone around me was saying how dreary it was. What a miserable day it was. And so I told my father I didn't understand why everyone said was so bad because it really was gorgeous out. And he laughed and kissed my forehead and said "You've always had a very different point of view." It made me smile. I worry about disappointing him, perhaps even to the point of getting kicked out of the family. I love them too much.

I saw "Oh Brother Where Art Thou" over at Mike's. Really interesting. Redneck Oddessy.

And since I'm feeling a little evil and I also want to spur my little sister to write more especially since I'm going to be leaving Friday. Here's her blog.

Sleepy time~!

Today was a blissfully peaceful day. Rainy, quiet, and I did a little bit of work around the house. Talked with my family. Helped put away Christmas decorations (even though it's not January 6th yet...but ah well). Made green tea powder. Stood out in the rain for a bit. Had some tea. Talked more with my family.

My little sister Lindsay has a blog. And I'm planning on a new layout, so I'll add her link then.

Mmm...Peace is nice.

Happy New Years.

I think I had a wonderful one. Spent part of it at home with Nigaki and Ben. We watched the Utena movie over glasses of sparkling grape juice and then part of the Big Lebowski till Dan managed to get out of the house so then we went over to Ben's and I cooked perogies and sang Christmas songs while Dan talked to Afton. Nigaki and Ben sucked face and we all laughed at Ben's stoner brother. Watched Beetlejuice and then the ball dropping and then Death to Smoochy. Got into a rather drawn out pillow battle with Dan till the tassles started falling off of Ben's fancy pillows while a pirated copy of Kill Bill played in the other room. Then took a tiny nap while everyone watched the commentary for Blade II. Then drove Nigaki and Dan home. Got home around 4am. It was a fun night.

New Years is an interesting holiday. One could probably find any day of the year and mark it as a place to go "what have you learned?" and after figuring that out "what will you learn?" I really like New Years. But the first couple seconds till midnight I always feel a little bit sad. Saying good bye to another period of my life. Maybe it's just a personification of saying good bye to another period of my life as well. But the second it switched, ellation! A new year! ^_^ I wonder what the future will bring.

It's new years resolution time! Let's do a check up on last year

Five things that 2002 taught me:

1. I'm never as good as I think I am and I'm never as bad as I think I am.
2. Exersize is a good thing.
3. Once you think you know everything there's always something that will make it seem like you know nothing.
4. Don't discriminate. That includes large drunk football fans. There are sweet openminded people in every class, generation, nationality, and orientation. That also means there are assholes in every class, generation, nationality, and orientation.
5. u_u; I have too much money and at the same time not enough.

Five personally significant events of 2002: in no particular order...
1. January 17th
2. Katsucon
3. Sophomore year in general
4. Lots of things in general but not really anything specific =/
5. Something? I can't think of anything at the moment

Five things I want to do in 2003:
1. Learn how to manage money better Actually success. My biggest money problem was one stupid mistake. but for the most part I got much better.
2. Give more Success. Ended up giving too much. but yup. Success!
3. Start to learn Mandarian and Arabic FAIL! Boo. But I'm starting up Arabic next fall.
4. Get better grades Also fail ^_^;; I wonder if I'm going to start taking a hint. I make this resolution every year and never manage to keep it.
5. Yasashiku naretara ii no ni (basically to be a little kinder in my heart) In my opinion another success. Too bad I went overboard.

Five things I don't want to do in 2003:
1. die Success!
2. intentionally hurt anyone Fail. But I did it for their own good.
3. be too greedy Fucking success.
4. give up the "no smart animals" thing Also success.
5. give up period. Just lose all my passion for things Success ^_^

Five people who I'd like to know better in 2003:
1. My grandmother as well as some of my heritage Success. Not quite the way I had thought at the time, but still a success.
2. My sisters. I really love them alot even though I don't think they love me back. Courtney especially. u_u Sort of successful. I've learned they love me back...well at least Lindsay does.
3. Steve. He really intrigues me...and then ignores me u_u; *the amazing invisable girl* FAIL! It sucks being the invisable girl to him and I don't care. =p If he doesn't like me then his loss.
4. soldier nabuca, wingboy02, youkoanddragon, insertotherSNhere. I'm not just adding this cause you added me. Success!
5. When you look inside, outside seems strangely familiar ^_^ Also successful! Very successful.

As for this year....
Five things that 2003 taught me:

1. Not all people are nice. Trust is a dangerous thing to do.
2. I have been fortunate. Things could always be far far worse.
3. I'm stronger than I thought I was. Sure, a little insecure, and inexperienced, but still willing to fight when things get tough.
4. Tea and hugs make anything feel better.
5. Himitsu.

Five personally significant events of 2003: in no particular order...
1. Sometime in March. I think it was March? and reconciling some friendships
2. Discovering the EPP list
3. Getting over an old relationship totally and completely
4. Trip to NY in August
5. Recent events

Five things I want to do in 2004:
1. Continue to learn...but start trying to put all that learning to use.
2. Start searching for a romantic relationship. I think I'm finally healthy enough to handle one. Not to mention it'd be kinda nice.
3. Learn to stand up for myself. Ironically enough I need to learn how to be selfish.
4. Get better grades. *laughs* I know. I'll probably fail it like all the other years but I might as well put it up there anyways.
5. Start learning Arabic again.

Five things I don't want to do in 2004:
1. die
2. do something I would regret
3. lose sight of myself and the people I care about
4. buy a Hummer
5. become really weak. And not the humble sort of weak...the bad sort of weak.

Five people who I'd like to know better in 2004:
1. myself.
2. my family.
3. my friends.
4. I used to think that no one else mattered...but I'm realizing random sucky people will slip into my world and destroy it if I'm not careful...so I want to learn more about the world for that.
5. there is no spoon?

^___^ Eeeeee!! Christmas was incredable. It's certainly the most wonderful time of the year.

So I suppose I can start off with me delivering presents Christmas Eve. Though I'm actually not quite done yet because I ran out so I need to make a new batch. But everyone loved them, and if they didn't like sweets they still felt loved anyways so all is good. Spent the rest of the day lounging around the house. Missed a few messages I wanted to get though...but all is well. I went to uber late service for church and sung in the choir. I like to sing but it was kind of amusing when my mother is all "in your robe you look all choirey" "well isn't that just SPECIAL" and we both laughed and the choir church ladies around us didn't get the joke at all....which was probably for the best.

Woke up early Christmas morning because my grandmother's house was forcasted to get 8 inches of snow so we wanted to get up there as soon as possible. Packed up everything. -_-; We had a bit of a road block in the way of a irrational PMSy sister. I love Courtney dearly...but she's incredably selfish when she's cranky. Anyways.

The drive up was rather uneventful. Though Sheetz was giving away free coffee and hot chocolate because it was Christmas ^_^ Oh, and there was snow on everything but the roads which was wonderful. And it's always a beautiful drive to my grandmother's.

We arrive, unpack, much hugs and love and wonderful family-ness. My Aunt Leslie was there too along with my grandmother's friend Fred. Had a great lunch which surprizingly enough wasn't Grandma's amazing soups, but it was little christmas tree shaped pasta that Aunt Leslie had brought.

We opened presents. I think my favorites have to be these wonderful good quality chopsticks, and a really lovely antique tea cup, spoon, miso bowl, and rice bowl set. They have a beautiful red dragon and firebird on each of them. ^_^ They make me very happy. My grandmother finds the coolest stuff.

My dad also got Pirates of the Caribeen dvd and my mom the old school The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe video. The old school Narnia movies rock my socks XD. And then my aunt got me a set of cute PJ's. I adore cute PJs ^___^ Especially when they're warm and soft. *feels all squishy*

But the antique set is definitely my pride and joy. ahhh *feels really happy*

So after presents we made Hollyberry cookies. Which I love...but really miss because I can't eat them. They use marshmallows in the recipe and I don't think it'd quite taste the same using Marshmallow fluff.

So then Fred came back along with the Turkish family next door. Jasmine definitely has the most amazing cheesecake EVER! EVER EVER EVER! Actually the entire dinner was amazing. My grandmother is the most amazing cook. ahhh. If there was ever a day for gluttony it'd be Christmas at my grandmother's. I think it had to have been one of the happiest moments I've had in a while. I've really needed this. It was beautiful.

Cleaned up and conversed with Ishmel, Jasmine, Fred, and my family all over a little champane (and really strong Swedish brandy which I didn't particularly like so I didn't have any of that). Then after our guests left we all watched Pirates of the Caribbeen. I skipped out before the ending cause I was sleepy and it's not like I hadn't seen it before. (Ahhh It's Piratey Miyavi *swoon*)

Went to sleep. Woke up. Packed up after having breakfast. Fred came over again and we all helped out my Aunt Leslie labeling these promotional postcards for her new book. It's a businessy type book so I'm pretty sure none of you would be interested in reading it but like, her publishing company gave her the shaft in promotion so she pretty much has to do it all herself. So yeah, we helped out with that. Another good lunch with leftovers and also more christmas pasta. Ellen came to visit too which was nice. Then both Ellen and Fred had to go so. More postcard stuff. We also opened stockings cause we didn't do it Christmas morning because of all the confusion. Got lots of chocolate ^________^ *hyperactive evil giggle*

Lots of hugs and love and stuff as we leaving. It was really wonderful. The drive home was also pretty uneventful which was good. Came home and unpacked and then Nigaki and Ben came over and we watched Pirates and made lots of Miyavi references and pirate jokes. Those two are way too cute, I'm mildly jealous. *giggles* I had my favorite tea while they were over, though they probably didn't know that. I was already really happy so I might as well celebrate.

There's still alot of stuff I need to do and a few people I still want to talk to. But for the most part this has been a really successful Christmas. ^_^ I reallly needed this and it was absolutely wonderful.

Oh, and this is supposed to be a different sort of Meme. It's a quote meme that gets to be hopefully be passed on from blog to blog.

"We must be the change we wish to see in the world." -Mahatma Gandhi
That's the quote Heidi wanted tattooed I think....I might be wrong. But coolies! yeah!!

Take the What Should Your New Year's Resolution Be? Quiz

You represent... naivete.
So innocent and trusting... you can be very shy at
times, but it's only because you're not sure
how to act. You give off that "I need to
be protected vibe." Remember that not all
people are good. Being too trusting will get
you easily hurt.


What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

Honor: You are an honorable person who is firm with
his/her beliefs and treats others as you are
treated. People would consider you humble at
times and very respectful, and someone to
definitely respect back.


Which Characteristic From the Samurai Code Matches You Best? (You may find out your best trait)
brought to you by Quizilla

You're chocolate. You're the old soul type, people
feel that they have known you their entire
life. Many often open up to you for they view
you as thoughtful and trustworthy. Although
people trust you, you have a hard time trusting
them. You prefer to keep your feelings bottled
up inside, or display them very quietly. It is
alright to open up every once in a while.

Which kind of candy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'll be singing tonight. I'm sort of disinclined to do things for my church because of their views on GLBT issues...but it's tradition. I'm surprizingly not singing the Ave Maria as usual, but I'm still singing. Soooo. Woot. I like to sing. It's a wonderful release of emotion. ^_^

I hope everyone has a good holiday. I won't be here tomorrow but I'll be back the 26th. I'm visiting my grandmother.

I did a Stuff. update. Deleted wallpaper I didn't like or didn't think anyone else would. I added a Miyavi and a Saiyuki one though. Changed some of the wordings on things too. Yup.

I finished making the presents. Now I need to package them and deliver them. ^_^ I hope everyone likes them. And to those that don't recieve any....it's because they'd spoil on delivery. So these are locals-only gifts.

You are Blue.

Overall you're a pretty content person. At peace
with yourself, you don't tend to over react.
Although at times you can be quite harsh and
cold towards others.


What Color Best Represents Your Personality?
brought to you by Quizilla

I made a new wallpaper. Also I'm going to start cleaning out Stuff. because of space reasons. Pretty much any wallpaper I don't like is going to get the boot. I don't think I'm going to change the layout though. It's far too cute. But yeah...I made a new wallpaper after months of none so woot! It's probably not my favorite....but none the less it's alright for the fact I haven't made any in months.

It's so good to be home. So good. Though I'm sort of twitching at my mother and her 700 club....more 700 club than my mother. If I had a dollar for everytime they bashed arabs or homosexuals...*sigh*

I've started eating more again. ^_^ It's great. I wasn't doing so well for a while...but things are looking alot better. So I'm craving a big bowl of pasta. Or maybe soup and bread. Or maybe a huge plate of sushi. Perhaps even a huge cheesecake. *swoon~* cheesecaaakkeee.....

I need to start making gifts today though. ^ ^ That'll be fun.

Thanks for all the comments.

I saw Return of the King yesterday along with Dan, Bishie, and Jordan. Bishie and Jordan while we were watching previews kept asking each other Tolkien trivia....Like... "Name all the wizards in Gandalf's order....colors too" And they were successful. x_x; *completely over my head*

It was really good though. ^ ^ Just cinemagraphically they did a great job. Though all the blood and crushing and picking up people and tossing them places...ug. I don't like bloodshed. Unless it's one on one. Then it's ok. I don't know why that is. One on one fighting is ok. All out war is not ok. *scratches head* I should figure that out.

And OMG the slashyness!!! O_O Am I the only one that sees this? Rosie or not there's something else there demnit. There's even a long forehead kiss. > >;

Ok. I'm going out shopping with my sister Courtney. so yeah~ fun! *loves my sisters to death*

Amoeboid.net was down. Blah.

Then again I'm just thankful I get webspace in the first place from Nigaki.

Nigaki's coming home~ Nigaki's coming home~ *dance dance excited*

I'm probably going to start up my cooking job for the break just to earn a little extra cash. Definitely made some mistakes this semester. Not to mention everyone's getting something homemade for Christmas cause I have no cash....well maybe like 4 bucks. But that's not exactly the best.

Sooooo yeah.

I'm still amazed at the cuteness of the Orange Range chibis. Then again this is coming from someone who still laughs at Kozi tripping.

My life is dull. *cheers!*

I've missed my family and friends though. I'm a little paranoid at the moment about untrustworthy people. I guess that's sort of understandable losing something in a matter of weeks that took 7 years to build. But....perhaps I just need to have quality over quantity. I thought I had quality...but.

...fucking cult...*grumbles*

It's nice to be home though...I really missed my family. Especially my sisters. And my dog. I love my dog. Though she ate my beef jerkey >_< I still love her though. ^_^ I mean, I gave her my favorite name. "Lily". So yeah.

*wanders off somewhere*

I'm baaaaaaaack~

Well if you haven't read or seen or hear anything else this morning, Saddam was caught.
I wonder if we'll "win" now and leave Iraq in chaos...or we'll start going after other countries on the US shitlist. Most probably Syria.

Sorry I'm so cynical about this...I just don't like war. Nor do I like this country's reaction. I suppose I am grateful for how worried people are about the civilian population though. That's been really good.

Perhaps I should be more optimistic...

What Usage of the Word Fuck are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'd say that was pretty good considering the other options were Fuck you, Fuck me, Fuck off, and Fuck Fuck Fuckity Fuck.

I don't know why I get so much amusement from that. Maybe I've been listening to too much Mindless Self Indulgence. Ever since Nigaki told of her concert fun I've been listening to them. hmm...

I'm feeling ten times better. ^_^ Yeah~

Also I had fun last night. The informal anime club had the last meeting over at my place. We watched Vandread, Dot Hack, and then half an episode of Saiyuki just to show how utterly horrible the animation is. (I then showed the manga. No dissolving there. mmm blood and guts instead!). We then went to Joe's favorite place, this gaming store in town. He said he was going to give me my own dot Hack//Enemy deck for Christmas. The sad part of that was though...I lost my winning streak! Sort of... I lost by one point. Then again Sean had a pretty built up deck and I just had Kite's. But that's no excuse! *sigh* ._. I was 6-0.... damn. Now I have to change the layout.

I have finals and things now. I have to return my library books too. *laughs* I keep forgetting about them.

I gave the sweet ratties a bath and now my arms and hands look like farfie's ^_^ I was a little worried that they'd hate me after that, but I think they see me more as a savior from the freak rain storm (aka the shower) than anything else. Most of the cuts have healed which is good. They were pretty much all shallow anyways. But now Yuki's a white rat again...rather than the sort of yellowish he was. And Shu's so soft ^ ^ *happy~*

The campus was having a Build-a-bear thing. And I got this sweet soft Husky I named Kantou Koukan. Mostly I call him Koukan. He's my new little friend. ^ ^ I have such a soft spot for fuzzy and soft things. Especially if they're huggable. Koukan's very huggable.

Sometimes I wish I could turn back time. That I could have lived in some of the moments of my past. But they pass. And then everything changes.

I hate when I see things coming...and I don't like what I see. And then when it happens I feel so...guilty. Even though I couldn't have stopped it, I still saw it. But then, if I was looking ahead when I was driving...and I saw two cars turning around the corner ahead of me that looked like they were going to hit. And then they do hit, it's not my fault right? But I could have honked at them, or maybe tried to get in front of one of them, or something...I did honk though. I did warn....and now?

I miss the person I used to know. She was a good friend and confidant. Fun to be around, a little frustrating at points, but she was loyal and sometimes very generous. Naive, hot-tempered but still patient. She was innocent......and now she doesn't exist anymore.

Sometimes I'm a little angry. Because circumstances or not, things shouldn't have broken this easily. I hate fighting for a person that won't fight for me, but it always manages to end up this way. I suppose I still would have fought even if I didn't get the same in return...but it still hurts.

Someday things will be ok. Because I should realize everything passes. But at the same time "Don't let your hearts grow numb. Stay alert. It is your soul which matters."

I will survive. I will grow. But....I still miss the past sometimes. I miss the past right now.

New Layout~

I really have been having a major lack of artistic inspiration. Papers and stress haven't exactly been helping either.

But whatever. If I don't have anything new, at least I can fall back on some old.

I had fun playing around with this image though. It's all marbley~ <3

Nothing really much else I want to talk about.