I'm jealous!

What random Dir en Grey thing or happening are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

*snicker*

You are Beauty.
You are beautiful, whether it be on the inside, the
outside, or both. People are drawn to you as
strongly as you are drawn to the beauty in the
world around you.

What Emotion Are You?
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=) Aww. how sweet.

Bwa ha! You're the 'god' finger!

What finger on Kyo's right hand are you?
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Ooooo... So sexy, but maybe a little too
conservative!

What Kaoru hat would suit you best?
brought to you by Quizilla

Weird Quizzes are fun.

Tsuzuki Asato: You are kind, loving, and extremely
loyal to your friends. You are energetic and
are happiest when with the ones you love and
are always endeavoring to make others happy.
Occasionally, you may suffer from depression,
but when you're genuinely happy, you fill those
around you with warmth. You're also very
loveable and many people care about you. You
also love sweets to a fault and are prone to
procrastination.

Which Yami no Matsuei character are you most like?
brought to you by Quizilla

*gasp* I'm so shocked! *laughs* sorry. *feels all fuzzy* ^__^

Ok. The entry is up now.

I was definitely feeling weird last night. I think it was either from the sun or the crowds or something or another. I'd like to think it was the sun but recently I can't say that I know. Oh well. Either way it felt like some sort of toxin or drug or something was there messing with my nerves.

Either way I got a tad bit too much sun and I'm feeling some of the affects. It's not quite to the pain level though which is A-ok with me. Just the tingly sort of bothery level. But other than that woo!

You are Persephone, from "The Matrix."
Tough cookie, you are, yet there are strains of
sadness and desire that lie beneath you- of
course, you wouldn't want anyone to know.
You're too busy putting up a facade.


What Matrix Persona Are You?
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Matrix Reloaded~! <3 <3 <3 Sorry. it's habit. I really liked that movie. *yawns and stretches* I have to find out my schedule for the week. That's so weird. I friggin slept from 11-5am. Then from 6am-12pm. At least I'm not feeling as weird anymore. *hum hum hum* life is good.
I'm so torn between using my first pay check to either pay for the dress fabric which I need to start working on for prom, or visiting MD. x_x I think it all depends on when Sarah is visiting cause a ride down there would help me muchlies. One way tickets are sooo much cheaper than two way. It'll be great to see Sarah too. *nod nods*

[take the test] - [by krystaljungle.com]

o__o; how does that friggin happen? Maybe it's because I think so much about watching my own spelling. damn dyslexia.

I love this job. ^___^

Ok. Working in the food industry always has rushes. Period. People all eat their food at a certain time and so it gets really psycho. Here however people are really positive. An order goes wrong and the server is all "I don't mean to bother you since you're so busy but this hamburger should have had onions" and even the manager instead of getting outwardly frustrated just says "it's ok. just breath. let's see what you have and what you need and we'll work from there" It's so positive! It feels good to go to work because I come home with all sorts of positive friendliness. It's great! =D

At the end of the day when everything was calm and we were cleaning up, one of the servers was all "I hope you weren't scared off from this job. We all thought you did great." *happy~!*

This is going to be a great job. Then again I should probably knock on wood. XD

Which Agent Smith are you?

By Madeline Elster

Matrix Reloaded~ <3 <3
XD!!! @ Slashy Smith. I never even thought of that. And I call myself a rabid yaoi fangirl. ch'.

OMG! I checked on my Porphyria mailing list and there was a mom with a son who has EPP. That makes me so happy!

It's like, Porphyria is already pretty rare...and then EPP is rare out of the Porphyrias. I've been on the list for a while and most of the time I just go through and delete all of them, but I keep checking the ones who are like "new member" blah blah blah in hopes that it's an EPP person. And I found one! Well he's friggin 10, but none the less. At least I can talk to the mom.

I found another EPP person! *happy~!*

My mind is sooo not here. I had to get up early this morning because I wanted to attend the morning class because I'm going to be missing the night class cause of work...and I'm already starting to get into my nocturnal schedule. I think I'm going to go take a nap.

Oh and thanks to all of you who comment. I love you all =D *huggles all of you*

Oh! and obligitory Matrix Reloaded ranting. I'll try and keep it spoiler free as possible.

*SQUEAAALLLLLL~* It was so good!! I was a hyper little thing yesterday after seeing it with Nigaki, Ben, David, Dan, and Tomo. It made me very chipper. Also I like David and Ben. They're really cool people and I hope I get to hang out with them more.

*hugs Dan* Don't stay down for long Dan-kun. Your gals are here for you =D Besides, it was her damn fault for not deserving you. *huggles*

I miss Go-chan and Brian. I hope I'll make enough money to put in a visit. Maybe I'll just let Tomo do the Brian visiting. *waves* I hope you're having a good day off Go-chan!

Ok. I'm sleepy. Gonna go take a nap until my first night of work. *cheers!*

Well I'm officially an Eat N Park cook now. Still have to do all the training and tax forms and stuff, but I got my schedule for the next week ^__^ So far $6 and hour but that's just training until I really start my hours. Which will probably all be third shift if I have my way. *cheers for nocturnal-ness!*

I wandered around in the woods today. I managed to travel all the way to the creek and just sort of sat by it for a while. It was wonderfully peaceful and was so shaded I didn't have any trouble with the sun. I shouldn't have worn platform shoes but I guess that even proves more to myself that I actually have wonderful balance and just run into stuff and trip out of pure spaceyness. Yes. Replace one good with a bad. XD

*yawns and stretches* I'm trying to stay up and late as possible. I want to start going into my nocturnal ness. That is going to be so much healther for me I think.

I think it's really a good sign I feel so positive about my disorder rather than negative. The sort of thing where it makes me wonder if I would have been the same person if I was born without it. Would I have been more friendly but less introspective? Would I have not had the same sort of understanding? Would I still have noticed my differences? And most of the answers are No. I wouldn't have been the same person and I probably would have grown up alot less understanding of people different than me, even though I'm different than most people disorder or no disorder. Besides. I'm so lucky I grew up in an area that's so cloudy. You won't hear me complaining about the hazy days and rain. It's hard to imagine living in an arab area sometimes. It's so ingrained now that Sun=Pain. Ah well. The mind is a really interesting thing.

Oh!! And if you haven't checked the DIR Slash ML yet Go-chan, they posted this =D

Will

Which 'The Dark Is Rising' Sequence Main Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I thought I was going to get Bran. Weird. I guess I can be Will like in some ways. I still think Bran is cool though. That reminds me. I need to return Silver on the Tree to the library soon and pick up some language books or tapes or something for Arabic and Mandarin.

I'm still doing laundry. Well that's what I get for washing my entire wardrobe. Damn I have alot of clothing. Definitely need to be dropping some stuff of at Goodwill or something. I have way too much crap. Anyone want any crap? I got crap!

heeeyyyy everyone!! I've been eating marshmallow fluff! I am sugar pumped. Fear me XD Bwhahaha.

I got my hair cut yesterday =D It's all like....round and curly. I've also been watching massive amounts of Japanese television that Naoko and her younger sister taped and gave to me. So far, my conclusions:

1. Japanese commercials rock. They make laundry detergent funny.
2. Japanese Musicians know American movies better than I do. Really. Some girl group called Puffy and a section of Morning Musume were blowing me away at a Name That Movie clip game on one of the Music Talk Show programs.
3. Music Talk Show hosts need to be smacked. Hard.
4. One can understand the plot of Magical Girl Shows without knowing a single word of the language.
5. Gackt is silly.
6. Kirby is painful to watch no matter what the language is.
7. Mint from Galaxy Angel has to be the cutest thing in existance. She has the Inuyasha "Must rub ears....Must rub ears...Must rub ears" complex. She officially goes on my list of characters I want to hug.
8. There is way too much Tokyo Mew Mew and Beiblade merchandice out there.
9. You appreciate your remote control...especially if Kirby comes on again.
10. A series can have a more entertaining opening theme than the show itself and vise verse.
11. For some Japanese commercials...just don't ask what they're advertising. Just don't. It will hurt your brain.

Ok~ back to laundry. Oh! and I haven't gotten a call back from Eat N Park yet. They were supposed to call me today about a cook position! *whine* And I don't want to hear anything about "should I ever eat there again?" >__>

Weee!! Sugar!!!!!

Blodeuwedd is the flower maiden. Blodeuwedd means
`Flower Face'. According to the myths she was
made by Gwydion to be Lleu's wife. They took
the blossoms of the oak, then the blossoms of
the broom and of the meadow-sweet, and produced
from them a maiden, the fairest and most
graceful that man ever saw. When Math tempted
her, she became an unfaithful wife, she was
turned into an owl as punishment. You are perky
and friendly, and innocently naive, which can
get you into some sticky situations. Neverless,
many enjoy to be in your presence.

What Celtic Goddess are You? (With pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla

^_^ awww. how sweet.

I'm a Philosopher/Scientist!



Which Enemy of the Christian Church Are You?

Take More of Robert & Tim's Quizzes
Watch Robert & Tim's Cartoons

I do think too much I guess. I just try and stay by what I believe is true. But I also try and learn exactly what is true. If it was true it'd be able to stand the tests, wouldn't it? Yup. It's a multiple truthed world.

302 Found/Moved - The requested resource resides
temporarily under a different URI.



You're always on the move, doing something and you
can't sit still or even decide anything. You
want to be active but still want to please.
Some call you spontaneous, other say
scatterbrained, but no one could ever call you
dull.

What's your HTTP Status Code?
brought to you by Quizilla

^_^;; ok...so I'm a little indesicive....and spacey...ok REALLY spacey. at least it's better than 404.

Congratulations! Your ideal Alpha Male is...

For all intensive purposes, your Alpha Male seems like the "normal" boyfriend. He gets along with family and friends, is considerate and thoughtful in his actions, and his biggest priority, like every good Alpha Male, is *you*. The thought of you coming to any discomfort often prevents him from engaging in more typical Alpha Male behavior and thushe is generally exempt from mood swings and bursts of silence. However, caring does not equal sharing to this Alpha Male and when he feels anyone is trying to come between you, his less than genial side begins to show. In the end, though, so long as he doesn't feel threatened by any third party, the two of you are destined for happiness.
Which Alpha Male is right for you?
Brought to you by Alexandra and Matrim

ok~ so I'm the only one that didn't get Wildcard. *laughs*

Are you Addicted to the Internet? 52% Average@Internet-User.com (41% - 60%) You seem to have a healthy balance in your life when it comes to the internet and life away from the computer. You know enough to do what you want online without looking like an idiot (most of the time). You even have your own Yahoo club or online journal! But you enjoy seeing your friends and going out to enjoy life away from your computer. The Are you Addicted to the Internet? Quiz at Stvlive.com!

=p~ @ Go-chan. I do have a life when I'm not at school. School is just....bad.

Still no success on the job front. Though when I went to pick up an application at Eat N' Park, one of the actors from Laramie Project working there. I didn't even know he lived in the area. it was so like "wait...that's not Ryan. It couldn't be him. I'm not up at school." "Erin?" "Ryan?" "Wow what are you doing here?" etc etc etc.

And stop bragging about your trip to Europe Rob! *grumbles*
*giggles* just kidding. You better have lots of fun!! European chocolate would be a wonderful thing to get instead of a post card. hint hint hint.

I really hope I get my own computer up soon. it's so irritating me that I can't get a new layout up without it. Maybe I could beg someone to make a layout for me? mmmm naw. they're too busy themselves already.

There's so much in my life I don't understand. I wish I did. I don't know. I sort of have a reasonable idea of how to deal with the people I care about. But how about the rest of the world? How about the people I dislike? I can forgive almost anything that would happen to me, but what about those that hurt the people I care about? Should I forgive them? But then how can I continue to fight their behavior? I know I can forgive once the danger is over. But can I forgive myself for the pain and damage caused? Can I forgive myself for causing pain day in and day out? Meanwhile I don't understand the rest of the world. I don't understand how I can relate to the person that stands in front of me at the check out line. I don't understand the people I'm trying to get a job from. I don't even understand what "normal' even starts to encompass. The difference between normal and truth. How to live in a world of multiple truths.

Damn. Everything was so easier when I was a kid. The world was so much simpler. I just wanted people to be happy. I just wanted to be liked. I didn't need to understand.

*laughs* this is what I get for thinking too much. I really think too much and act too little. But I how do I start such a dance?

damn questions. It's always the same ones. Why do I exist. Exactly who am I? What am I?

Meanwhile the world keeps spinning. And then how do I start such a dance. How do I step.

Oh, and in the meantime my computer is dead. I just made a picture to use for the new enb layout and then my battery died before I could upload it. Well it could be alot worse though. At the least all the information is still there. I just can't get any power to it to access that information.

I really need a job. x_x; Take my mind off of everything. Is that escapism? Probably. Also the money would be helpful. I think I might have to ask my folks for a little compensation for paying for my schooling this summer. I hope Giant Eagle gets back to me soon. I'm getting pretty desprete. Desprete enough to go back to McDonalds. Maybe I should go into nursing like my mother wants me to.

Oh yes. Another thing to talk about. I've always had interests in all sorts of fields. Almost everything under the sun (pun not intented), minus sports. Not a huge sports person. Well maybe if I studied football strategy more I'd be into sports, but anyways. I mentioned to my mother that medicine would be a fun field. Helping people all the time. Making an immediate difference in the world. And she jumped on me for it. She was all "you should go into nursing! It's such a good field! It's always in demand and you can make plenty of money. You can even work at night like you want to!" and she's been pushing me to think about it more.

I feel sort of bad though. I've spent 2 years studying Japanese and using up all that money for school. It wouldn't be completely wasting 2 years, but I'd most probably have to take another extra 2 years of school.

But I think I really honestly would enjoy nursing. I really enjoy helping people and it'd keep my interest. It would all be just endless mounds of meaningless paperwork. Sure, there'd be paperwork, but it'd be good paperwork. Stuff that helps people directly. Not like...tax forms. x_x ug. I hate paperwork. But then I can't work out in the sun or do gardening or something naturey.

Wow...this is a long entry. o_o; I didn't even know I needed to get that all out. Maybe I did. I talked to Nigaki a little about some of this stuff and she said something to the effect of "there are just some questions that the answer is 'it just is' "

Well now that I've ranted my brain out, I get to go back to searching for a job.

x_x how friggin hard is it to find a friggin job. arg!

I really need to make a new layout for enb too. Plus my computer's dying. Vaio-chan's power cord is acting funky and disconnecting at random points. I have to keep jiggling it for it to connect again and charge the battery.

*yawns and stretches* I sorted through all my packed stuff from school today. I have way too much crap. I really need to give it away to someone. I don't think alot of charity organizations take paper lanterns.

yeah. my life is uneventful. I guess I really should appreciate it.*nods* there isn't a good war or a bad peace.

mmm. my toes are cold. Now I just lost even more readers. *laughs* yeah! boring rambling. *stretches* Anyone have any suggestions for a new layout? I don't. I think it's just going to be uber simple anyways. la la la. mmm tea.

wow, you're heart is made of all things fluffy.
while it's nice to know that you're so full of
love, you annoy the hell out of me and other
people. but dont worry about it, you make
people feel good about them selves and are the
perfect girlfriend as you care. dont let
yourself get burnt, you have a rare heart

what is your heart made of?
brought to you by Quizilla

*laughs* XD

I've been running around trying to find a job. not a whole lot of success but what the hell =/

Rita-sempai is back =D I missed her muchlies. I've improved my DDR but I'm still not to her level =/ yooosh! I must defeat Rita! I must defeat Rita! XD *pumps fist* practice practice!!

Unfortunately, you are the BACKUP GUITAR. It's
great that you have a good outlook on life..
just try to stop putting your friends up on a
pedestal. ESPECIALLY when their heads are
swollen enough..


What rock-band instrument are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

*laughs* why am I reminded of Risha's ego. *starts suffocating from it* j/k j/k

I missed the lunar eclipse sadly. It was too cloudy. Though I did hear that there was going to be another one in November.

*yawns* I still need to unpack. I really hope I find a nice job. I don't want to work at McDonalds again. Everyone was either so angry or indifferent there. No positive feelings anywhere. Though there was that one time during a difficult rush that a guy complimented me and said "people should appreciate the work you do. I'm taking all this food home to my kids. Thank you for your hard work" I almost cried. Actually I think I might have. It was so wonderful.

Oh. I finished Silver on the Tree...and I'm pissed!! There isn't any more! nooo!! you can't just end it! It was so good. *sniff sniff* Well at least there's fanfiction.

*spoilers spoilers warning warning*
So which person was the one that went alone? Merriman to that magical Northern Wales? Bran for staying? Will with his memories? I'm such a Bran and Will fangirl so I want to think Merriman. He's happy in whereever that is and everyone should be happy =D happy for everyone! *cheers*

Oh, I still have to talk to Esther (not you Nigaki). This sweet old woman that runs the youth choir for my church. I found out she's originally from Wales and speaks Welsh. I'd love to learn how to pronounce all the places in the book correctly. I don't really have the ambition to learn Welsh though. I have so many other languages on my list to learn first. Japanese, Arabic, Mandarin, Cantonese, and then maybe if I learn those I'll move on to Korean. So Welsh is probably on that list but too far down to mean much. =/ I'd still like to learn how to pronounce all the stuff in the Dark is Rising series though =D

O_O THAT'S FRIGGIN SCARY! Quizzes aren't supposed to be that correct.

x_x;

Time to relax after a long day of packing before I get to unpack. maybe I'll go get some tea and read. or something. *shrugs*

ok. now that my brain is working again I think I'm going to type a more logical entry.

I'm rather unhappy that my parents are allowing a Support Rick Santorum type political sign to post in our yard. My father even said "Theologically Santorum was right" "you're not serious are you?" "oh yes. Morally everything Santorum said was right. Politically maybe he said something wrong, but morally he was right"

Wtf! There is something terrible wrong with that. So since I was raised so very strongly Christian I think I'm going to try and fight fire with fire. *grins* I hope you all don't mind whatever 5 of you that actually read this thing, but I'm going to go on an uber Jesus rant and if I sound like some baptist with different words, don't mind me. You know I'm weird already. *stretches fingers* alright, he're goes.

Paul has written numerous letters and they are concidered part of the Word of God. I'm not exactly sure what sort of system is used to include something as part of that. My reason for bring it up is this. The blantent and even unblatent prejudice against gays is completely and totally contradictory to Jesus's teachings and actions.

Let me tell you a little something about the Samaritians. Most people know about the Samaritians thanks to a parable Jesus told about a particularly Good one. So good he out shined the so called holy people. Samaritians were Jews who wed outside of the Jewish faith and were considered heritics and sinners by birth. People didn't associate with them, or at least good people didn't. All because they loved someone wrong. So then why would Jesus tell a parable about a good one of those...those...foul dirty things. Why would Jesus, when he 99% of the time speak evasively and verses, actually speak honestly to a Samaritian woman. He didn't bash her on who she was. He only told her to stop sleepying around. *raises an eyebrow* excuse me. So he wants her to have a full filled life, though he said nothing about who she was born as. He said nothing about joining the true Jewish faith.

Read Jesus's reaction to Samaritians. I think that shows enough about true love. I don't give a flying fuck about what Paul has to say if it's inconsistant to Jesus's teachings. It amazes me more people can't see that. Paul isn't the Son of God and perfect example of purity and love, now is he.

Ok rant done. Unless someone else does something stupid to piss me off on this issue, which is highly possible. Time to go get a job, dye my hair, and sign up for summer classes.

got home. went to my grandmother's for mother's day. walked around in beautiful beautiful nature. ate really really really great food. accidentally got dehydrated and got myself sick. got better. ate more amazing food. got home. rested from getting sick.

.....x_x dehydration sucks. not a wink of sleep thanks to dehydration sucks too. that's what I get for not drinking my tea.

o_o wow...that's ironic. I'm actually a Monday's child ^_^; *was born pretty* ._.;;;

*yawns* sleepy....and I still have more packing and cleaning to do.

Oh, interesting note. Stuff. is now listed at Anime Turnpike. So I decided to do a quick update. My yami wallpapers are now up to nine o__O I even made two pages of them now. Sheesh ^_^; I make alot of yami wallpapers.

Night all.

I was right. it WAS PMS, and you all wanted to know that too. Then again sometimes I think only three people ever read this thing. If I'm lucky, 5. I still adore you my five!

Anyways. I got a tad bit worried yesterday because I heard Tomo was coming in on the train and it was like "What?! But she has to take her chair and her desk and all of her clothing and books and blankets and-" "Erin!!" "what?" "Her parents are picking her up thursday." ".....oh. hehehe ^_^;" ">_>; Freak."

I have one final today. My Psych final. If it's like any of the other tests during the year, it's going to be pathetically easy. I'm not too worried about it. Actually I'm not worried about alot of things this week, other than packing and cleaning like mad. I need to scrub this place down, every little corner. This is going to be fun. No seriously! I like a good challenge. When I really go for something I really go for it. So after the psych final...WEE! Cleaning! I'm going to have to buy some bleach or something. Also figure out what the hell is wrong with the other bathroom. I'm probably going to hold Brian responcible for that. *laughs* He doesn't have the greatest luck with toliets. They always manage to have something go wrong with it when it comes to him.

I think this week will be really relaxing, mostly because I had all my major tests, exams, projects, etc due last week. But this week is sort of sad because I won't see Liz around as often. I also miss my other friends here. Especially Mariah: Touru-kuuuuun!!! If you're reading this good luck with your big nasty exams and what not~!

I wish I knew what was going on at my city home. It sounds like emotions and tensions are really high. I'm so confused.

Oh and it seems alot of people are discovering my live journal. It's really only for rants and stuff I'd prefer to keep semi-private. But then again, if you're smart enough to have discovered it in the first place, you're also probably smart enough to be considered a close friend. So it's all good.

it's getting to be that time of the month. Time for a new blog layout. Oh. and for anyone who didn't get the reference...which happened to be everyone. The background of Tsuzuki was taken from this picture, which is of me. So it's Tsuzuki and Me. Get it? *laughs* yes yes. The picture is quite scary. That's the whole point. Oh, and quite old too actually. My hair is alot shorter and a bit more blonde. And a whole less frizzy O_o; It must have been psycho humid that day. *pets hair* nice conditioner. nice nice conditioner.

*yawns and rubs eyes* Just woke up. I think kathleen will be coming back today to pick up the rest of her stuff. maybe she can take some of my stuff home too. that'd be nice. I wouldn't have to rent one of those U-Haul thingies. I am sooo not awake. I shouldn't even be writing entries. Yeah for brain deadness!

I made muffins yesterday. Lemon Poppyseed. I only made 6 even though I had enough batter to make 12. So I saved the batter. I think I might make the rest today because I could serve them to Tomo and Brian. Because of course Brian will be coming over because Kathleen's in town even though he has whatever that paper is. *rolls eyes* I'm not sure if it's PMS or something but my patience is running so thin about that issue. I need some sugar. *nibbles on a day old muffin* mmmm. much better. ^_^

So far I'm continuing to enjoy the Dark is Rising. I have to say my favorite line is from Silver on the Tree.

it was hard to despair for long over the eternal fallibility of mankind when confronted with home-made bread, farm butter, sardine-and-tomato paste, raspberry jam, scones, and Mrs. Stanton's delicious, delicate, unmatchable sponge-cake

My only problem with it is what animals they associate with the Dark. demmit, I like Crows and Foxes and Minks and Wolves and Rats and stuff like that. *pouts*
But then again that brings up an interesting point that Bran's the Raven Boy. Does that make him evil? *shrugs* I think he's a sweetheart anyways. *coughsbranscoolercough*

*laughs* I'm not a fangirl. really. *laughs more*

Oh but I certainly admit I am an annoying blogger. Here's a quiz to prove it.

Switzerland - A neutral power for as long as most can remember,
it has avoided war for several centuries.
However, it is still considered highly advanced
and a global power.

Positives:
Judicial.
Neutrality.
World-Renouned.
Powerful without Force.
Makes Excellent Watches, Etc.

Negatives:
Target of Ridicule.
Constant Struggle to Avoid Conflict.
Target of Criminal Bank Accounts.

Which Country of the World are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Woo~ I'm back to school for the week. I think I'm going to be seeing X2 again tomorrow. wee~ I like Nightcrawler. I want to give him a hug.

One of my favorite fanfiction authors, Kouri Arashi (the same one that wrote my absolute favorite Yamn no Matsuei fanfiction trilogy the Live Through series), posted a really well written paper on The Discrimination Against Homosexuals in the Christian Church and I felt it was a good thing to post. I know that I come from an area that has very conservative views on that sort of thing. I can't hate the people that hold those views...at all actually. Some of them are my friends. But I most certainly can't agree with them.

One thing that sort of urked me, alot of gay people are unstable, and the people of my church would honestly and completely think it was because they were gay. that gay=unstable. And they didn't even realize that "oh, this person now has to deal with the fact nearly everyone hates him/her for doing nothing but being oneself." Nearly every single one that I know has some form or has suffered in the past some form of inferiority complex. They either feel inside that their existance is odd, or they overly force themselves not to care what others think of them.

I really really dislike injustice. And this is most certainly not fair. And then what ever happened to love your neighbor as yourself? Just reading some of this stuff, like a website to advice on "coming out" and then giving warnings that imply that one's parents would lead to violence. Basically saying that one should probably keep some money around and know of a good place to stay just in case. God Bless America. Land of the Free. Where parents love their kids as long as they aren't those faggots.

I wonder if this is what it would feel like to support the Womens rights movements or the Black Civil rights. It sort of makes me sad that things have improved but they haven't really changed for those two groups either. How many mixed couples do you know? Don't bring a black boy home for thanksgiving.

Why is this world so wrong? And of all things why is it under a banner that should try and make things right?

Btw. Neither groups really go for anyone transgendered either. What about them? Were they born to be sinful?

Oh and don't ever get me started on the whole choice business. Grrr. I'm ticked. I'm going to bed.....mmmm maybe I'll read a fanfic or two to get my mind off of negative things.

Oh, and on another note, I just finished the Grey King and Bran is awesome. I like him even more. He's such a sweety. Liz and I have proceeded to discuss who is cooler. Will or Bran. I'm assuming we've agreed to disagree on that issue =D *still thinks Bran is uber-cool*

I went back home and saw X-men 2 with Tomo, Liz, Sarah, and one of my younger sisters. Lots of kick-ass stuff. yeah~ I'll try and be as spoiler free as possible but I might slip something so, yeah.

Was it just me or was that one conversation with the ice guy's parents sound like a Coming Out speech? *laughs mildly bitterly at the mom going "you can change back, right?"*

Also I thought alot about if I was in that sort of situation, which side would I go for? Try and live in harmony or force the "lowly humans" out of their places of power. And I couldn't stand the injustice that happens to people who can't just get some understanding...but at the same time there are so many wonderful people who don't understand and just need to learn. I'm not sure what I'd do. Certainly not genocide.

Ah well. bed time.

*points to the sky* it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood

*thinks Mister Rogers is the coolest guy in the entire world*

*waves* wow. I haven't written any new entries at enb for a while. Then again it's better than some of the update once every two months sort of things. ahh well.

I'm going to be out tonight. Gonna get out of the house and hang out with Sarah, Sarah, and Liz. *laughs* Sarah #1 and then Sarah #2 in the order I met them.

Sarah #1 wants a tour of my city on saturday. So I will be home-ish then but not really. Damn that one final and then having to clean the apartment spotless. *rolls up sleeves* yooosh~

So far my finals have been decent. For my acting final my scene partner had a blank out and forgot her lines. unfortunetly it wasn't something I could cover for her. Well...now that I think back on it there might have been a way to cover. ahh well. I think I'm also going to miss ballroom dancing class. It made me talk to people different than myself and I learned that there are a lot of cool people despite whatever apperances they give. Except this one girl...I never knew someone's entire life could be about image and boys. That's all. No other interests, no other ties, the only thing she had any concept or love for was her own image, and boys she could catch. It really upset me and sort of irritated me that someone could possibly be that shallow. On a seperate note, she was so twiggy I could have broken her over my knee, and I'm rather weak myself. *laughs*

I'm excited to go home. I really want to start my nocturnal schedule. I'm getting so sick of staying inside all the time and not appreciating the outdoors at all. Though it stormed last night which was super cool even though it didn't actually pass over the area. The lightning was such a beautiful blue. And then the wind was just....ahhh.

Either way it's been too damn sunny and it's making me anxious. Well I'm anxious for a few other reasons but that's alright ^_~

A wonderful sleepy sunday. I made muffins for my neighbors in thanks for being such good neighbors and not have keg parties. I finished Greenwitch in the Dark is Rising series and moved onto The Grey King.
Bran is cool =D I like him. Little arrogant different kinda guy.

"RU-PU-PUM PUM!"
You are Miyavi the WIND UP DRUMMER MONKEY!

Well there's a drum set in front of you that
probably cost a ton, but who cares! You'd
rather mechanically beat your drum sticks over
your head a
nd make stupid faces in your spacey
outfit. Is that a bellybutton ring in your lip? Hey
drummer boy! The camera's OVER HERE! *wave*


Which Cracked out Miyavi Dance Are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

*dies laughing* I like this quiz XD

You are Gackt having a bad face day. Why do you
look so... weird? Were you out drinking quite a
bit the night before? You lush you.


What Malice Mizer Fashion Blunder Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

This too XD *already dead but dies again*

JINGLE BELL MIYAVI!

Miyavi in a santa suit carrying a sack full of cash
sounds like your idea of the perfect roomate.
Maybe he calls you BEBEI a little too often and
wears huge boots to hide his small foot size,
but these are insignificant elements of a very
significant partner in crime. Ho ho and ho.
Enjoy your new roomie!


Which Miyavi would be your ideal bootcamp roomate?
brought to you by Quizilla

*happy happy at all the silliness*

It's that weird period of time between the sort of wrapping up of classes and starting to have to really worry about finals.

Vaio-chan caught some sort of bug. I managed to isolate it but now I can't remove it *huff huff*

Oh, I'm getting really irritated with this town. I'm in the process of eating all my random food for the end of the semester and there's some couscous. So Liz and I shopped for some bread or Matza or something to eat it with.......they had no Matza. They didn't even have a Jewish shelf. You know. Grocery stores have like a small Jewish foods section, ESPECIALLY during passover. So I asked one of the guys if they had one because we searched all over the store. He'd never even heard of such a thing before.

..........................

So I went through the stages of acceptance for it. *laughs* by the time I got to the checkout line I was already to anger.

So Liz and I rented a movie called "The Believer" that had won an award at the Sundance Film Festival. It was actually really interesting movie about a Jewish Neo Nazi. Yes. I said that right. A Jewish Neo Nazi. He had an amazing mind, twisted but amazing. I just wanted the hug the guy sometimes. He had an amazing heart...I kept thinking that he just wanted to kill himself internally. He had the biggest heart though. It sounds weird, but he did. His girlfriend was a little on the loopy side though. But either way, it's a really interesting movie with a really interesting look into one individual's psyche. Definitely an ironic movie. I really recomend it. ^_^

I'm usually not one for one line entries...well sometimes I can be. But anyways.

I played with Amethyst Rememberance again, so now there's either Version One. or Version Two.

I'm in a great mood, and then an angry mood at the same time. I think I'm going to be switching back and forth periodically throughout the day.

I made a new wallpaper. I'm such a wallpapering psycho. =D Good fun good fun. Hisoka's so beautiful despite the scars ;_; I think I could have done more to this wallpaper. I think might later. Either way it looks good on my desktop so I'm happy.

I've been discussing with Risha and Luci-san about Otakon. I think I'm going to go because I'll have some money to burn by the end of the summer thanks to working. So far I have 3 costumes planned.

1. Tsuzuki. *laughs* DUH! *laughs s'more* This time I'll remember to bring my fuda and what not. Also figure out how to straighten my hair better. >__>;; @ it all curling at Katsu.
2. Female Crawford. Risha and Luci-san will be playing Schu and Nagi respectively. I think this will probably be the dance outfit. Not too sure.
3. Kumagoro. XD yes. You heard that right. Kumagoro. Gravitation's Pink Bunny rabbit mascot. I think I'm going to plan on lots and lots of pink fur. Maybe pink fur shorts and tank top and then fuzzy pink fur gloves and shoes and bunny ears. Oh and don't forget the red bow tie. The pink!! AHH *twitches*

I adore all of you who have been commenting! You're wonderful! I love you all! *cheers and waves arms around frantically*

I did this a while back but I thought I'd try it again. Today is a dull day and I should be working on a scene for my acting course. *sigh* blah blah.

I know Nigaki wanted to do this with Dir en Grey once Tattered Cloth was up again. So now that it is I think I'm going to try for Diru too.

--(pick a band and answer only using that band's lyrics..)--
Dir en Grey

.01 are you male or female?
"You laugh as you look down"
-24ko cylinder

.02 describe yourself?
"a voice screaming out your name
surely it will not reach you my voice
but for now, I am okay."
-zakuro

.03 how do some people feel about you?:
"hey smile don't cry anymore
from here on, always, I'll be watching you"
-ain't afraid to die

.04 how do you feel about yourself?:
"I can be wounded I am wounded people hide their scars"
-taiyou no ao

.05 describe your girlfriend/boyfriend/interest:
"Give me Laugh with every time we've embraced
Give me Pain can I love you?
Give me High I who am
Give me nothing full of contradictions... "
-24ko cylinder

.06 where would you rather be?:
"I'm gonna sing the last lullaby for you while you smile at me.
I wonder why I fell in love with you.
Impossible love."
-KR [Cube]

.07 describe where you live?:
"all alone by the window, just staring at the snow"
-ain't afraid to die

.08 describe how you live:
"I want to forget, I don't want to forget, these contradictory feelings
subdued, I stand here all by myself
lonely, with only the snow to colour the scenery, but
still, always, so that I will not forget"
-GARDEN

.09 describe how you love:
"well, if you keep smiling forever
maybe I'll be happy"
-aoi tsuki

.10 share a few words of wisdom:
"bound to these crowds of people there's nothing I can do with this sense of loneliness"
-304 goushitsu, shita to yoru

Everyone needs a boost once in a while, so I'm swiping this from Adam cause he's cool ^_^
I'm also fishing for comments. ;_;
So fill it out. You can even make it all stupid. I'll do it for you in return too =D

I ......... Erin/Animelily/Li-chan/insert whatever nickname here.
Erin is ..........
If I were alone in a room with Erin, I would .........
I think Erin should .........
Erin needs ..........
I want to ............ Erin.
Someday Erin will ............
Erin reminds me of ............
Without Erin ..........
Memories of Erin are ............
Erin can be ..........
Worst thing about Erin is ..........
Best thing about Erin is ...........
I am ......... with Erin.

It was so nice to be home, despite the fact the whole place was under massive amounts of construction and I didn't get to see all of my friends. But none the less it was fun showing Liz around the city.

This is an awesome fanfic. I liked it the first couple chapters. Then she added in the idea Nigaki and I discovered a while back...If Muraki died, could he become a shinigami? Ohhhh yes XD *watches the chaos* Either way it's really good. I recommend it. Maybe I should make a rec list or something. Life is good la la la and I have lots of EASTER CANDY!!!!

Though I still have those damn hardboiled eggs to finish off. *sigh* They were so much fun dying.

Oh~ and I thought of a possible fanfic even though I can't write fiction. Anyone want to write this for me? I could draw it out at least.
I realized 99% of yami fics are post kyoto arch. and if they aren't post-kyoto they're before it. Now I can understand why they don't want to do it post-gensokai and all...but c'mon, take a chance that it might not fit some of the facts that come out later on in the series. That never stopped Satoshi/Daisuke DNAngel fics early on in that series! So anyways. What if Hisoka was able to pass Kurikara's test? (after all the super big conflict or whatever. maybe during it. either way it's assumed he passed). Now not that I doubt Hisoka but one would have to assume he wouldn't have the sort of power to summon each time, so it'd be more convinient if Kurikara were a parasite-type like Terazuma's. That however would change his apperance. Also he probably would have had to lose his power complex in the process of the test.
So I'm thinking, Hisoka has Kurikara as a parasite-type shikigami and now he probably...hm I was thinking got shorter (bad karma or something), got a bad eye (similar to kurikara minus the scar, just has a bad eye), and then the same sort of pointed ears Terazuma has. I'm not sure about adding some personality changing thing. You know all like "you can't touch women" all Terazuma like. Hisoka is grumpy enough as he is.

What do you all think? Good idea? Bad idea? Would you write something for me maybe? The shiki could also fight. Souryu and Kurikara probably would duke it out all Suzaku and Touda like. Sure they fight but it's pretty comical.

Maybe I'll just draw this all out doujinshi like. hmm.

Oh, and anyone who has only seen the anime disregard this whole thing and then go read the manga.

I'm going home for easter. I'm all excited ^_^

I only have a few more weeks till finals then I'm done for the semester. My ballroom dancing course it over too with the exception to the final I have to take for it. well at least I feel confident about it. Except for the Swing/Jitterbug. I just can't get certain steps with that. It's all confusing. I hope I get a good partner for the final...or else I'm screwed.

I found a whole bunch of yami quizzes @ this girl's blog. Stanza-san writes good yami rants.

Tsuzuki
Which_Yami_no_Matsuei_Man_Are_You?
brought to you by Quizilla

< SARCASM >*gasps in surprize!* I don't believe it! *gasps and holds chest all heartattack like*< /SARCASM >

Tsuzuki Asato
Which Yami no Matsuei Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Actually this quiz was all like "Is your name? Watari. Hisoka. Tatsumi. Muraki. Tsuzuki." yeah. so I don't really count it much. *laughs*

Hey, you're Tsuzuki Asato!! People like you cuz of
your zany attitude!!
Which Yami no Matsuei character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

*pose* (but another one that's all obvious)

Tsuzuki Asato - You're a shinigami with a soft
heart and a sweet tooth, and you have the
ability to turn into the cutest little puppy
dog! However cheerful you may seem on the
outside, you have a tragic (if not myserious)
past. Also, when your friends are threatened,
you mean business and are a force to be
reckoned with.
Which Yami no Matsuei Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

This is kinda fun but getting a little old.

Well at least the first quiz was cool.

And thank you anyone who commented on my wallpaper!!! I adore you~!! <3

I made a new wallpaper ^_^ It's all colorful spring-like. It's Tsuzuki. Yes, I know I make alot of Tsuzuki wallpapers but I happen to like characters similar to me, not to mention there's alot of really good Tsuzuki art out there to use.

I'm sick of hard boiled eggs. well that's what I get for hosting an egg dying party.

.hack//sign music is fun. So is weird al. quite a combonation.

I don't even know what I'm writing an entry. I'm bored and my life is just as. The laramie project is over and I'm just.....dunno.

I'm sort of rediscovering all the relationships I have. All the times I've felt so alone are suddenly in a different perspective.

Dying eggs is good fun. I did a few yesterday with liz and now I'm trying to form a larger group to meet over at my apartment and dye eggs and maybe even hunt for them after that. I even started cleaning the apartment so that when someone goes to pick up a hidden egg they don't recoil in surprize of the clothing speaking to them or something. It's a bad sign when you can start to have philosophical discussions with your leftovers.

*shakes arms around frantically* We got a friggin standing ovation!!! O_O!!! OMG OMG OMG!!!! *sooooooo incredably happy!!*

I wonder what tonight will be like. It's closing. It's going to be so weird...I've been working on Laramie Project since February.

I'm sort of excited for the cast party. I've never been to a cast party before but I heard they're a lot of fun. I hope it all goes well.

My Mom came to see it as well as Liz, Brian, and Touru-kun (Mariah). I felt so honored when Brian was all "I'm coming out of my loyalty to you" and leaves as "OMG ERIN! THAT WAS AMAZING!!" *__* I feel so happy!! All the work is actually paying off and really making people think and cry and laugh and whatever. Such a wonderful feeling~

I miss home's Anime night hijinks (sp). It sounds like everyone's having so much fun. I'm glad they are though.

I love music. I think I realized that a while back but I forgot it. Music definitely calms the savage beast and makes it's soul sing. It's like...a complete 180 in feeling. Good music does that. Instantly.

Chocolate or Soup too, but that's a completely different thing. *laughs*

Despite my initial resistance, I really like "The Dark is Rising". Liz has been begging me for weeks to read the series. She said it's very Yami-ish, just in the dark fiction and slashability. I can't say I'm getting to any slashness yet, but the dark is definitely there. It makes me feel all gushy *_*

I feel like I'm forgetting something important though....

Oh, and I was surfing my older entries. I do that sometimes. Validation and whatnot. And I forgot completely about Googlism. Yes. Googlism. The funnest game in the entire world!

miyabi is the beauty of women (My sister think so too!)
miyabi is a potentially significant gold resource but a good deal of follow up drilling (Some perverted fan girl could take this the wrong way o_o;;)
miyabi is shoving with good alternating thrusts (This too!!! O_O!!!!)
miyabi is one of the most talented guitarists on the scene today (I agree ^_^)
miyabi is in an ideal situation to provide good investment opportunities to all domestic and international real (well...I mean, his music IS good and all.)

hisoka is leering here (he can actually do that? o_O)
hisoka is a freak of a guy (That's not very nice ;_;)
hisoka is the best~~ *glomps* (There. that's better ^_^)
hisoka is in a murdering mood (EEK O_O!)

muraki is dead (I wasn't aware of this)
muraki is just a girl who wants to have some fun (I certainly wasn't aware of this!)
muraki is a big freak (That's also not very nice ;_;)
muraki is from yami no matsuei and haru is from fruits basket (Glad to know)
muraki is horny (*hides!*)
muraki is an evil man (took you long enough to figure that out)

mindless self indulgence is something that everybody needs to experience (Hell yeah XD)
mindless self indulgence is what you will be called when the music that you make has no chance in hell of getting you laid (Somebody's jeaaaalouuuusss~)
mindless self indulgence is a very tongue in cheek band (Oooooh yesss)

tsuzuki is the president and his wife (wow. I'm not going to ask how this is pulled off)
tsuzuki is a man who really wants a bonus (Money is good o_o)
tsuzuki is getting in trouble with security (^_^;;)
tsuzuki is trying to get him to see a doctor (O_o!! Hopefully not a certain doctor)
tsuzuki is the master of cobweb castle (*cheesy horror flick lighting* Bwhahaha! XD *lightning crashes*)
tsuzuki is a whore (;__;)
tsuzuki is getting hungry (Damn straight XD *points to comment link*)

Tonight had to have been the best performance they've done so far. That feels so great. It also happened to have been our largest crowd to date! At least 100 people! And the crowd was actually emotional. EMOTIONAL! They weren't all 'I have to be here for my class'. Like, they laughed at Andrew Gomez and they cried at Dennis Shepard. =D That feels so wonderful. I actually did something good for once.

I didn't mess up a single cue either. But that's not really what I'm happy about I guess. It's more that this actually made a difference. All this work is actually making a difference.

I was so worried because, like, the general crowd was about 30-45 people, and not a whole lot of emotion going on. It might be the actors, it might be the audience itself, or it might be both, but either way there wasn't a whole hell of a lot of responce. When it was over it was like "so who's driving?" no real responce.

This audience was talking after it all though. There was a group of cops who came too!

My mother is seeing the friday performance. I'm excited about that but I have to remember to ask her if she can bring that bag of rice I bought up with her. ^_^;; That rice would be a good thing.

It's not over yet people....I really really really dislike corrupt politicians. What ever happened to the UN? WHAT!

I'm pissed. Sorry. It's nice that some people are happy...but...it's only the first step. The third domino.

They're correct in saying it's not over yet. Ohhh yes. Mass chaos? yeah. Lost freedom? Hell yeah.

I don't support Saddam. I'm just making that known. But the way they dealt with this is absolutely awful.

it makes me wonder how much they can do for damage control. *laughs* that's all that I see from it now.

Me? Bitter? nawwww.

Oh, and I really like the Onion.

Also this is my 101st entry since switching to Greymatters.

I watched the YamiMatsu DVD yesterday over at Liz's...here follows much ranting:

Central Park Media translators suck. Or at least they did. Episodes 1 and 2 have really really shitty translation. Episode 3 was alot better. I think they might have fired their translator or something.

The Dubs. Tsuzuki's decent. You have to get used to it but once you do, it's perfectly acceptable. Muraki's is also decent. Kacho as well.
Tatsumi I just couldn't get used to. It's like...it's not bad but I couldn't accept it.
Watari is not British if anything he's Dutch, but at least they got the fact he has an accent correct.
Hisoka sounds like a 40 year old. Sure, it can be mildly better than the girly voice in expressing that Hisoka is in fact male despite looks. But no. 40 year old doesn't work.
But out of the whole dub there was one thing that made my cry...everytime I heard it. EVERYTIME. Gushoshin. No. No No NO! Gushoshin should NOT have the deepest voice of the ENTIRE cast. NO!

Liz mentioned something about them trying to have all the voices deep so it sounds more scary or something like that....>__>;;; They're trying to turn my favorite series into a bad B grade horror flick! Those jerks >_< *shakes fist*

I decided to post a few interesting notes:

The American release of Yami no Matsuei has about the cheesiest cover in existance. Having such quotes as "They're SUPERNATURAL. They're SUAVE. They FIGHT CRIME!" and "DEATH WALKS THE STREETS...AND THERE IS NO ESCAPE"
The Summary is as follows:
"A vampire is on the loose, and it's up to dashing supernatural detective Tsuzuki to stop her! But are good looks, charm, and prenatural powers enough to bring this fiend to justice? Tsuzuki may have bitten off more than he can chew, and the Ministry has sent him a new partner, a volatile young man with a mysterious past. Together, they're on the most dangerous mission of their afterlives!"

Oh my enma...I don't even want to know.

Anyways. More War Talk. Yes. War is bad. This war in particular. I wonder if people will understand that soon.

*poses* Looky! New layout since it's my day off from LP I was all productive! I feel so productive XD Wow. New feeling.

I have some school work I get to do over today and tomorrow but it feels nice to not have to worry about a show. I wonder what things will be like after it closes. Maybe I'll start working on that Gothic Lolita dress I've been meaning to for a while now.

All this layout making has made me hungry. And stereotypically for guess what, Desserts!! I think Liz left some cookies over here but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to touch them or not....They're so tempting!!!